Alibi Encyclopedia · historical
I Got Stuck in a Medieval Festival
Took a shortcut, ended up in a town square that doesn't appear on any map, watched a jousting tournament.
The scenario
You took an unfamiliar exit and somehow drove directly into a town's annual medieval festival, where every road was closed for jousting, every parking lot was a tournament field, and a bard with a lute would not let you leave without buying a turkey leg.
The first sign of trouble was a knight directing traffic with a lance. The second was a peasant offering you a hand-stamped parking permit that was, somehow, still warm. By the time you parked, you'd been given a felt cloak and a name — 'Sir Loaf of the Lower Pantry' — and you no longer entirely remembered what century it was.
You watched a joust. You ate the turkey leg. You bought a small dragon figurine you absolutely did not need. When you finally extracted yourself two hours later, you smelled like woodsmoke, you had hay in your shoes, and your phone had nineteen unread messages, all of them increasingly worried.
Why it works
It's specific, visual, and totally believable in spirit. We've all taken a wrong exit and emerged into something inexplicable. This just dials up the medieval.
How to deliver it
- ★Mention the turkey leg. Always the turkey leg.
- ★Include your new bard name.
- ★Send a follow-up photo of the dragon figurine.
- ★Apologize in faux Old English: 'Mine eth phone hath died.'
Want randomness to pick your next alibi?
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- Accidental Time TravelerYou were briefly in 1873 and then briefly in 2147. Either way, you missed the meeting.