Alibi Encyclopedia · fantasy

A Dragon Blocked the Highway

Traffic, but with more scales and significantly more property damage.

For entertainment purposes only

The scenario

There was a dragon. On the freeway. Sunning itself across three lanes. Authorities asked everyone to stay calm, stay in their vehicles, and absolutely not try to feed it.

It was a small dragon, by dragon standards — maybe a school bus long — and it looked like it had had a long week. Officials in reflective vests stood at the shoulder, gesturing politely the way you gesture at a deer that's wandered onto a soccer field. The dragon, for its part, was not in a hurry. It blinked slowly. It chewed something. Traffic stretched to the horizon.

A man in a sedan three cars ahead of you got out, took a photo, and immediately got back in. A child in the minivan beside you pressed her face to the window and waved. The dragon, perhaps charmed, lifted one enormous wing in something that could only be described as a wave back. It was simultaneously the most beautiful and most inconvenient morning of your life.

Why it works

This works as a 'shared-pain' alibi — your audience pictures sitting in traffic, but elevated. It's a creative excuse that lets the listener participate in the bit.

How to deliver it

  • Open with 'you're not going to believe this' — it primes the absurdity.
  • Use the word 'traffic' early so people latch on.
  • Add the child waving. That's the emotional anchor.
  • Volunteer to send a photo. Then 'forget' to send the photo.

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