Alibi Encyclopedia · sci-fi
I Was Summoned for Jury Duty on the Moon
Yes, it's mandatory. No, you can't appeal. The trip alone takes a week.
The scenario
Your name was randomly selected from a federal lunar database you didn't know existed, and you've been summoned to serve on a jury at the moon's first inter-agency civil court.
The summons arrived as a small holographic envelope that hovered politely above your kitchen table until you opened it. The court date was tomorrow. The travel time was four days each way. There was no option to defer. There was a line in fine print that read, 'Refreshments will be provided.'
You're calling now because you'll be unreachable for approximately two weeks. You're sorry. You'll bring back a small souvenir. Please feed the plant.
Why it works
Layers a real, familiar inconvenience (jury duty) over an impossible one (the moon). Surprise is the engine of humor; this excuse runs on it.
How to deliver it
- ★Use government-summons language. 'I have been compelled.'
- ★Promise the souvenir. Buy one at the airport later.
- ★Mention the refreshments. It's the funniest detail.
- ★Send a real follow-up two weeks later. The bit deserves it.
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